DoctorLuke's Xanga

Conspiratorial

Fri, 16 Oct 2009 20:58:05 GMT

OK, I'm creating a one-stop shop for as much of my online writing as I can, and so I wanted to create a feed from here to there (http://lkallberg.blogspot.com), and I was afraid that xanga might vaporize my account if I don't post on it at least every two years because Hotmail did that to me a couple of times, so I'm writing this post just so they can see it's active. See? See?

Notes Upon Leaving Chicago

Wed, 26 Mar 2008 03:25:53 GMT

Random Notes

So I'm moving to Oklahoma City next month. Clearing out my office, I came across a pile of paper scraps that I've written random thoughts on over the years and wanted to think about more...now I need to throw them away or take them with me. I'll note their contents down here for future use by me, or immediate use by you, and make use of the wonders of this digital bulletin board!

I apologize that some of them may be a but obscure...but then, I know what they mean. :-þ

- Might God only reveal truth in the context of relationship?

- The original, the first, the True Story

- Investing time in people: more than just fishing for problems to solve in tehir lives? (vs. spending time)

- Value in "normal" things? - Did God make them?

- Does true doctrine inevitably leave itself open to legitimate criticism?

- Seeing God would mean an increase in faith, since faith is the evidence of things not seen.

the pure in heart will see God
add to your faith virtue, to virtue, knowledge

- If they see a supernatural working, it will increase their faith

but what brings the faith initially? A pure heart?
they could see a supernatural working, but not see God in it
on the other hand, with a (pure heart?), they could see the supernatural hand of God in many various events...

- Beliefs dictate actions

- The Greeks were the first civilization to adopt a more abstract, naturalistic cosmology. Did they do that because of the failure of their gods in the Trojan War and after? (Divine Right of Kings)

The end of histroy and the last man, Fukuyama
a history of ancient Egypt, Grimal

- Is the basic Christian purpose to Know God or to Make Him Known?

can you have one without the other?
Re-stated: Should the Christian feel that he is fulfilling this or that purpose?

- How do you win the heart?

characters who's heart changed
Scripture that speaks of the heart
the heart is the seat of belief
how do you change your beliefs?

- That the great balance in life is to balance experience and reason: experiential truth with abstract truth (it seems like we choose God, but it makes more sense that he would choose us)

- The One True Story, More Love, The Next Step: Maturity, The Next Step: Revalational Knowledge, Learn to be Childish

- Does God do things because he has to or because he wants to?

- Trusting other's sense of God's will in their lives

- When most people say "truth is absolute", what they actually have in mind is a particular set of truths that they think are absolute

- "Faith is the victory that overcomes the world" - Victory = faith in the midst of an imperfect world: one that has sin in it; even has your own sin in it.

Joinin' ATI Released!

Sat, 29 Sep 2007 21:15:24 GMT

Joinin' ATI Released!

Luke Kallberg, in conjunction with Rocky Farm Studios, is pleased to announce the release of their newest album, Joinin' ATI, a celebration of the Christian life and unique memories of life and work at IBLP.

Tracks include the immortal Bachelors 'Till the Rapture original live recording from the Headquarters valentine's banquet 2002, the classic thriller ATI Goddess, and the title track Joinin' ATI. Interspersed are original songs focusing on the trials and joys of following Jesus in every-day life. The crowd-pleaser Ghost Chickens in the Sky is, of course, an added bonus.

Retail price is $5, shipping $2. For more information, message doctorluke. Complete track listing:

Cafe De L'Amour
Troubled Bridge
Dr. Fred is Turning 50!
You Know it’s Mr. Gothard
You Had to Let it Fly
ATI Goddess
The White Queen
Just A Start
To the One I Love
I’m The Squanderer
Bill’s Story
Young Jack Daniel
Cowboy That’s in Love
Eighteen Years Old
The Master Plan
Another World
Bachelors ‘Till the Rapture
My HQ Bonnie
Wisdom I Can’t See
Lament of a Spensaphile
Take Me Down to the Warehouse
Joinin’ ATI
Ghost Chickens in the Sky!

A sample is available in my audio blog.

How To Become A Christian

Fri, 18 May 2007 03:51:02 GMT

"How To Become A Christian"

from various passages

Two authors started me on the road to questioning the modern Evangelical Reformed mechanism for salvation: C. S. Lewis and Donald Miller. The explanation currently popular is basically some combination of "Believe and Repent". However, as I think about the steps the Bible tells us to go through, or steps it shows Bible characters going through, I find that it's much more mysterious than that. Certainly, Believe and Repent are in there, as well as Accept and Receive. But check out this list:

Follow Jesus - Mt. 4:19

Believe in Jesus Christ - Acts 16:31

a). Receive him and b). Believe in his name - Jn. 1:12

a). Confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and b). Believe in your heart that he resurrected - Rom 10:9

Repent - Acts 17:30/ 2 Cor. 7:10

Be baptized - Acts 8:36

Listen to someone preach about things Jesus did, then start speaking in tongues - Acts 10:44

a). Repent and b). Be baptized - Acts 2:37-38

Sell your posessions and follow Jesus - Lk. 18:22

Love God - 1 Cor. 2:9

Continue in Jesus' word - Jn. 8:30

a). Know Christ and b) Believe God's promises - 2 Pet. 1:2-4

Walk in the light - 1 Jn. 1:7

Open the door to Jesus - Rev. 3:20

Abide in love - 1 Jn. 4:16

In all, fifteen different mechanisms, some combining each other in different ways. In context, each of these are presented as the way to become a "Christian". I'm not coming to any definite conclusion at this point, but I do think it's apparent that many people in the modern Church have over-simplified the Gospel.

A Little Introspection from Taiwan

Tue, 10 Apr 2007 02:33:07 GMT

May I Indulge in a little Introspection?

(I just finshed writing the following for an IBLP newsletter: I don't know if they'll use it, but after spending all that time I might as well see if I can get someone else to think about it too! I dunno, I suppose I didn't talk enough about "ministry" stuff that I did. But as I thought about what God brought me through, this was the truth that I had to tell about it.)

My sister Naomi and I planned ever since last February to be part of the CI trip to Taiwan/Hong Kong this year…mostly because of our amazing experiences during the first two trips we had joined. We’ve done a number of short-term missions trips with IBLP, and the expectation would be that we would get into a rut; that the work would become routine and expectable. But that was not the case.

I think I have found that the greatest lesson I learn while on missions trips to Taiwan and elsewhere is valuing other people...because I value Christ. Projects will soon become routine: but people are always new, always challenge me to give myself up for them by giving myself up for Christ.

In past years, there have been great opportunities to build lasting friendships with native Taiwanese people, and I looked forward to continuing those relationships and also making a connection with new friends. Yet as the four-week trip progressed, I found myself grasping and failing to find fulfillment and purpose in being there. The greatest sense of accomplishment and worth comes when I meet a challenge that is nearly too much, but I feel Christ hold me up in the midst of it. But this year, everything seemed familiar and cozy. Particularly teaching C.I. small groups, I felt like I was unable to reach students because I was doing all the same old things that I had done before.

During the third week, in Taipei, God convicted me of my lack of love for others: students, fellow teachers, and friends in the area. I recognized just how much I was focusing on the process of teaching rather than reveling in the people God was bringing across my path.

If becoming proficient in lesson-teaching was taking the challenge out of the C.I., it could only mean that my vision was limited to teaching lessons – rather than touching and changing the lives of students and co-workers! Ouch!

I’d like to say that everything snapped into place from then on, but the truth is that it continued to be a struggle. God allowed me to feel increasing love and compassion for my precious young students, but I constantly was conscious of my apathy and lack of vision for being there. As I clung more desperately to Christ, reaching and pleading to see his hand in my life, I slowly began to have renewed motivation to inspire the same in others. And as I wanted it more, I realized how much I was lacking.

As God worked on me in this area, I sometimes felt somewhat like an unregenerate Hippie, but, hey, that has it's fun times as well (In Hong Kong, Tim Chen asked a Role Call question that everyone had to give their answer to: "What would you like to accomplish in life?" All I could answer was "I want to love somebody.")

I did finally begin to see God’s hand in unexpected blessings and impossibly timed coincidences; in the glowing thanks of parents whose children were already changing for the better at home. I continue to see it in the fruit being born in the lives of those I’m still keeping in touch with.

But for me, the story of Taiwan/Hong Kong 2007 is one of becoming hungry and thirsty for righteousness, of counting all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ. The experiences of this trip brought me, more than ever, to desire God’s control in my life, rather than my own.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Thu, 29 Mar 2007 16:19:47 GMT

Seeing God

Some time ago I was telling someone about how I like to travel. I want to see new places, meet new people. Indeed, I had just met this guy for the first time earlier that week, thousands of miles from my home. My friend asked me, "What is it that you're searching for?" I hesitated, almost answering sarcastically, but suddenly an answer came to mind and I knew it was the truth - "God. I'm searching for God." He was a little surprised. "Don't you think you know him? Haven't you found him?"

Yes, I do know him, and that's exactly why I want to find him. I seem to get little glimpses of God through the events of my life, and it's the most exciting thing I've ever experienced. I go through life turning over each moment like a little rock...wondering if I'll see God. It's definitely something that's learned. I still only recognize Him at times; now and then, unexpectedly. But, somehow, I've always felt that when I'm traveling - encountering new places and new people - stepping out from my routine life - there is a special sense of God's presence, a special recognition of his hand guiding events, a special freedom to reveal him to people. I see God working in me and working through me when I travel.

I see God, and that makes me want to look for him even more.

God's Work

Could something that is spiritually harmful to one person be spiritually helpful to someone else? Could God want to shield one person from an experience, but use it in someone else's life? I think so. I have personally been helped by things that would have harmed other people I know, and also spiritually torn down by things that built others up. Things that worked for others didn't work for me, and things that have worked for me don't work for many others. Why does God work differently in different people's lives? Could it be that God uses many different methods to draw us because if he always used the same things...they wouldn't work? Does it have something to do with the way we are made, our human minds, wills, emotions? If there was some method that anyone could apply and it guaranteed that they would know God...then wouldn't it be easy to focus on that method rather than on God?

Wouldn't it become our work rather than God's work?

Unity

Is it good to be unified? Or is it good to be diverse? I think we all realize that it's not about one or the other, it's What are you unified about? or What are you diversified in? We need to work together on the right things, and we need to work separately on the right things. I think we can also see that a group of people could be both at the same time. I think the classic model of a team working together is a group that is unified in purpose but diverse in action. yes, there are times when large groups of Christians should come together and do exactly the same thing. There's a time for that. But they all must recognize that it's a temporary standardization of behavior.

I think there is only one thing that all Christians should always be unified in. I don't know quite how to say it, but it's something like knowing, seeing, glorifying, having a relationship with God. What if we could ever be unified in doing something other than seeking, knowing, glorifying God? Then that would be the thing bringing us together, not God! Could it be that we only come to full unity as we seek Christ individually? It's when we try to copy each other's relationship with God that we start comparing, condemning, and losing the image of Christ from our lives.

The presence of God's Spirit brings unity, not the other way around.

So let's look for God, let's find him, let's savor the moments when we glimpse him...let's see him in our own life!

An applicable song...

Fri, 05 Jan 2007 04:06:32 GMT

You had to let it fly,

so why didn’t you catch it when it fell?

Oh no, oh no.

These teardrops that we cry,

we all know the story that they tell,

oh no, oh no....

Livin’ a life of uncertain choices,

Listenin’ to so many voices,

We all walk down that road...

I’m walking down a road

I can’t quite see around the bend

Oh no, oh no.

These people all around,

They all want to know their journey’s end

Oh no, oh no...

What to do with the time we’re given?

Somethin’ more that makes life worth livin’,

We all walk down that road...again.

We’re searching for a way

to see past this life we’re livin’ in,

Oh no, oh no.

Oh, hear us when we pray,

and show us the place where life begins,

Oh no, oh no...

La, la, la...

We walk across the land

And let fly the seeds we want to sow,

Oh no, oh no.

Don’t hold it in your hand,

You’ve got to be willing to let go,

Oh no, oh no...

Guess you knew that you could not keep it,

Why, oh why weren’t you there to reap it?

You had to let it fly,

so why didn’t you catch it when it fell?

Oh no, oh no.

These teardrops that we cry,

we all know the story that they tell,

oh no, oh no....

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Thu, 21 Dec 2006 07:16:30 GMT

The Value of Not Knowing

When people ask me how I'm doing, I like to give them a personalized answer rather than something mindless like "good" or "great!". I try to quickly come up with an adjective that describes my initial impression of "how I'm doing" at that moment. Usually something like "quirky", "fun", "anticipating", "peaceful", "frustrated", "hoping", etc. Recently, though, I've been having a lot of difficulty coming up with something quickly, because my feelings have been really confused, complex and contradictory. I don't feel bad or unwell, but I have this nagging sense of missing out on something. I love what I'm doing every day, but I feel sad that I'm not doing other things. I love the people around me, but I feel impatience with spending much time with them. And then I feel frustrated at myself for not being content with where God has me, but when I think about it, I think I really am content. Basically, I feel torn. I see it as an attitude that needs to change. But what needs to change?

As I think about it, I wonder if this feeling arises from my desire to know, but my belief that I don't know. I'll try to explain briefly:

I WANT TO KNOW - not so much what I'm going to do in the future, but what is the right decision for me to make...on decisions for which the time has not come yet. I want to know the rules of life. I want to know what I should do and shouldn't do...tomorrow and the next day and forever. I want to know the Mind of God.

I BELIEVE THAT I DON'T KNOW - as I've decribed several times on this blog, I don't believe that God gives us absolute knowledge of what decisions to make - knowledge that we can hang onto and try to apply in new situations. I think God wants us to be in a close relationship with Him so that we hear from him moment-by-moment what the right decision is in each new situation. Yes, he reveals his Mind to me, but not all at the beginning. I have lots and lots of ideas about what decisions to make and why, but I don't believe I know right now which ones are God's will.

So I think that I need to end one of these two things - either cease wanting to know what I'll do if a certain decision comes up, or else come to a place where I believe that some of these ideas in my mind about the future are actually God's will, and start acting on them.

Right now, the result of all this is it's keeping me essentially where I'm already at in life. Well, it seems that way. Basically, I'd like to be moving fast, but find myself moving slow. I ask myself the big questions, and find that I have to respond "I Don't Know". Last year, the big controversy in certain circles was whether I was in love. I had to answer over and over, "I Don't Know"...and don't dare tell me that stuff about "When you're in love you'll know it", okay? I was tortured by that question and all it's implications and corollaries. I finally decided I wasn't, but it was only a halfhearted decision.

So maybe from practical necessity, or for whatever reason, I've been wondering for a year or two if it might not actually be a good thing to just...not know. When we know, we start to trust in our knowledge. We start to make decisions based on our knowledge. We make plans based on our knowledge. We decide for ourselves what's right and what's wrong, all based on our knowledge. But if I don't know....then I trust in God. I make decisions based on my relationship with God. I make plans based on my relationship with God. I wait for God to tell me what's right and what's wrong.

When I was 10, I basically memorized the Guiness Book of World Records. I've always been a voracious collector of knowledge. I've always had a huge appetite to know. But what if the greatest value is in not knowing...and making decisions anyway, one at a time?

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Thu, 21 Dec 2006 07:14:10 GMT

Should I be Concerned About What Others Think of Me?

There's a lot of scripture that has been used to proof-text both sides of this teaching (proof-texting: starting with your belief and then finding Scripture to back yourself up)...I suppose there are at least two questions that could be asked:

1). "Is their negative opinion of me going to affect their opinion of God?"

2). "Is their negative opinion of me going to affect my ministry?"

The problem with both of these questions is that they are based so heavily on "their" opinion. There are people who will be offended and turned off by the very same things that will impress and attract someone else. So while legitimate to bear in mind, I don't think any of us should ever feel "controlled" by the sensibilities of any particular group of people. "All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any."

There is a scripture that is often used to argue for being sensitive to the sensibilities of others, being careful not to "offend the weaker brother" - "It is needful that offenses must come, but woe unto him by whom they come." What if this scripture can be taken both ways? It doesn't specifically say "Woe unto him who offends another." What if it's just as bad to unjustly take up and offense as it is to unjustly give offense? What if, when someone really should not take up offense, but they do, then they are the one "by whom the offense comes?"

I have to say that sometimes, I am very concerned what others think of me, and sometimes not concerned at all. Sometimes, I feel like I am being more spiritual by listening to them, and sometimes by ignoring them. I don't know that there's a particular rhyme or reason to the difference...perhaps whether I think the thing I've done was a bad thing or not?

Do any of you ever wonder how that opinion of others should influence your life?

In other news, yesterday I got my first ever speeding citation, doing 93 in a 70...I'm trying to let that one sink in and influence my life...

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Sat, 18 Nov 2006 02:50:29 GMT

Thus Far has He Lead Me

Some really difficult things have been happening here at HQ that have caused me to question why I still work here. I suppose no matter where I would work, there would be difficulties. But recently it seems that several of the major breakthroughs that seemed just on the horizon have been systematically thwarted. A number of discouraging things happening all at once, and I see people around me that I love, hurting. The question that burns in my mind: "Why do I continue to subject myself to this?!"

I think the answer must be that I am not subjecting myself to "this" - not to circumstances, not to IBLP's idiosyncrasies, not to people or things. I'm subjecting myself to God - to my Father, to Jesus Christ, to the Spirit within me. There is no reason to ever subject myself to anything other than God. But when I do that, I find that "subjecting myself to God" turns out to mean many different things each day. If I get caught up in today's duty, and begin to think that I have moral obligation to do that particular task in itself, that is when I will get frustrated. My attempts to do the thing will be iniquity, doing it under my own will, doing it because I decided I should. I don't think God will ever give me grace to submit to an earthly authority, or to conquer sin in my life. He will only give me grace to submit myself to His Lordship; and then he will reveal to me, step by step each day, what that means.

Submitting myself to earthly authority or circumstances is not the first step to submitting myself to God. It's not a prerequisite to submitting myself to God. Submitting myself to God is the One Big Thing. Truly, there's nothing else. There is no equation to show the relationship between Faith and Works. Faith does not grow up into Works, and Works do not grow up into Faith. They grow up together in this spiritual experience called "Life".

Sometimes things happen around us that grab our attention. We must always return that attention to God. If we take our eyes off of him, even if we are looking toward where he's leading us, even if we're looking at the steps we must take to follow him - we won't have the grace to follow him through those very steps.

So I'm still here because I'm hearing God's voice every day, telling me to be here. When circumstances get louder, I need to get closer to God in order to continue hearing his voice. Right now, circumstances are very loud. I praise God for it, because it's making me cling tighter than ever to my relationship...only with Him.